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Forums » RP Discussion » Mental Illness and Roleplay

So! I was wondering how many of us have a mental illness? I personally have Bipolar disorder, PTSD, and Major Depression disorder. I have found that RPing really help me cope with my diagnosis.

Anyone else?
I've had anxiety all my life and used RP to hide from it for a long time, so it didn't start out too healthy to begin with but I find it helps me a lot now. :P Writing has always helped my mood stability overall.
I've known that I've had Asperger syndrome for most of my life. It's a major reason why I'm still so shy, even after all this time on Furcadia.
Sanne Moderator

Clinical depression, anxiety/panic disorder, and avoidant personality disorder. I also have sensory processing sensitivity which creates a very interesting combination.

Roleplaying is fun and I love doing it, but I've also come to realize how easily it overwhelms me if I don't plan things carefully. I've restricted myself to 1-2 roleplays at a time so I don't stretch myself thin and expend energy into it that I need elsewhere.

While it has helped build skills that are vital in treating my health issues, nothing really beats professional help. Having my problems properly diagnosed and getting adequate help from a psychiatrist, a psychologist, and a counselor in a group environment has been invaluable in dealing with things and moving forward in life. :)
Tate

Severe anxiety, autism, depression, PTSD.

I'm not sure how much RP helps me anymore, because unfortunately, a lot of people in the RP community don't stop and think about others before they speak, and just seem to wallow in their bigotries. So, outside of a tiny group of people, I hardly RP anymore, and even with said tiny group, just doesn't happen as often, but that's mainly because everyone's busy...or I'm busy dealing with whatever is sucking my energy away on any particular day, physical or mental illness related.
Mortem

Severe anxiety of many different kinds. It actually prevents me from roleplay 99% of the time. I'm actually scared of what ppl think of my characters and writing ability. It's dumb and irrational. My hands get sweaty just thinking about it haha.
Due to a rough past, I've always struggled when it comes to mental illness. I have severe depression (MDD) and insane amounts of anxiety, even if online it might not seem like it. I used to be very painfully shy - to the point I couldn't even speak with my teachers at school! Throw in ADD, dyslexia and PTSD you get the lovely mixture that makes up me. I also have some physical issues that only serve to agitate things like my depression, such as severe allergies to a lot of things, severe asthma, and an injured leg that prevents me from doing sports I used to love. I sound like a textbook nerd, haha.
BobbinK

Due to the mix of a traumatic childhood and bi-polar type II, eventually leading on to PTSD along with dyslexia, I sought out escapism from the tender age of 11.

Roleplay has always helped me in ways that I can't describe, it gives me a sense of belonging and normality. I personally think this community brings a lot of us together, i've been fortunate enough to meet plenty of lovely people. :)
I have Autism. It is high functioning. I also have anxiety and ADD. I am going to a therapist once a week and thats helped not only me, but also my family.

I was recently diagnosed with Autism. As before when I was diagnosed with ADD, the docs knew there was something different about and there was something other condition but didnt know what exactly. So I was not officialy diagnosed with Autism until I was 18. I didnt start seeing my therapist till 24.

We are working through goals and she has told me time and time again that I need to not spend my entire time on the computer. To go out and socialize once a week. Although internet socialization can be helpful, real life helps as well!

That being said. Depression is a huge struggle for those of you who have admitted to having issues with it. My boyfriend deals with it as well and refuses therpatic help. Having internet friends available just to vent to, is a amazing load of help! So I am glad it works for you as well as it does for me.

You are all awesome and lovely. Just try to remember that our disabilities arent bad, it just means we are simply that. Different! And never in a bad way ;)
I have a pretty detailed mental health history. Currently my primary concerns are Generalized Anxiety Disorder with occasional Panic Attacks and Episodic Depression- usually occurring in tandem. i.e. I get super worked up and nervous about something and it becomes a full body experience. After that calms down, I am usually really depleted of energy and can feel very hopeless about my situation. These days, my depression usually happens after a severe bout with anxiety/panic and increases during winter.

When I was younger, I had incidents that left me with PTSD and started a 7 year long eating disorder when I was 13. I experienced a major depressive episode after I stopped engaging in eating disordered behaviors at age 20. I was going through an incredibly hard time in my personal life (a really, really bad breakup of a 4 year relationship) and my main system of coping skills (albeit maladaptive ones) were no longer working for me. I was suicidal and spiralling in my own chaos. I went to a partial hospitalization program, got stabilized, but I came home to limited resources and basically no social support outside of my family who struggled to understand 'what my issue was'(many of my friends were shared with the person I broke up with).

I ended up pretty much staying in my room for 8 months, struggling to find motivation to do basic daily care. much less leave the house.

I found roleplay again during this time, and while I may have been engaging in depressive behaviors, the inclusive world of RP allowed me to distract myself and find another coping skill where I had floundered for months. I would wake up each day and pretty much set myself up to RP until I slept. While it wasn't balanced, the act of engaging in something that I really liked motivated me to do really basic things I would have otherwise struggled with: eat, get out of bed and walk around the house, not kill myself.

I am happy to say I am so much better off now than where I was, but the RP community remains as a huge part of my heart and certainly helps me when I experience a symptom exacerbation. The people here are (and I say this with the utmost love and adoration) misfits like me and some of the most compassionate listeners I've found on this planet. Doesn't matter that it's text on a screen- there's a human attached to the other side.
Depression, Anxiety, ADD and a bunch of undiagnosed problems, all of which I take no medication for.

It affects my RP to the point of me being unwilling to seek out or accept RPs with unfamiliars due to fear of performance. I am also very moody and will unreasonably seclude myself from my friends when in a bout of depression.
I have Borderline Personality Disorder, Major Depressive Disorder, and Asperger's Syndrome. A volatile mix, yes, but one I've been living with for years.

When it comes to RP, I'm still (more than) a little bit shy about approaching people for RP and posting my own posts on the forums. Also, I feel like my characters HAVE to be perfectly balanced out of the sheer paranoid fear of being called the dreaded Mary Sue. So I have many reasons why I don't RP more than I should.

But why I still do it despite all this is simple: I love what I do. To read the developed profiles and posts of people I'm playing with gives me a rush of excitement. It makes me happy to just be alive sometimes, even when I'm not having the best of days.

Like Sanne has said, nothing beats professional help but I think a really good roleplay is also a nice coping tool to have. (Even if it's just lurking the forums like I do.)
I have Asperger's (undiagnosed because I weighted the pros and cons of getting a diagnosis and concluded there are more cons) plus I used to be really, really anxious about everything, including RP-related stuff. RPing has helped me a lot in decoding normal human interactions. Learning to present my characters in a way that would entice others into RPing with me was a long journey, but I now credit RPing with helping with my presentation skills as well.

I used to be depressed, sometimes a lot. The few times I sought professional help it mostly ranged from disastrous to unhelpful or frustrating - especially when it came to condescension towards people on the Autism spectrum. So I looked for help elsewhere, with varying success, but now I'm depression-free and, for the most part, am managing my Asperger's really well in most settings.

For the fellow Autism-spectrum people out there - I've found this book to be IMMENSELY helpful in understanding 'normal' social behaviours http://www.afieldguidetoearthlings.com
I have Depression! As well as anxiety and ADHD. It's really great, especially because it affects the ways I perceive other's actions and reactions, as well as my own worth in the world.

Did I say great? I mean it's horrible. I try not to talk about it much, but it really does make even simple interactions hard. I think I started RPing as a way to try and cope...somehow? Although, it makes it hard to start games with strangers, and to judge my own writing. It's a huge mess.
borderline personality, intermittent explosive, oppositional defiance, attention deficit hyperactivity, generalized anxiety, avoidant personality, post traumatic stress.

i've known for most of my life the list of disorders that i deal with, i was diagnosed with adhd and odd around 4 years old, while the rest i was diagnosed with when i was 14-15 (i'm 23 now).

to be honest roleplay doesn't really help me anymore. i get really irritable these days with all the drama that seems to keep coming around and the ways people somehow manage to drag me into it. i also just don't have the time as i work full time, go to school, and have a 4 year old daughter while planning two weddings. it's just an unfortunate part of life.

i've managed to work with my disorders, to the point that unless i told most people they wouldn't realize i dealt with these things unless they were extremely close. i'm determined not to be controlled by my disorders.
I've been diagnosed with ADD and Anxiety and additionally treated in the past for both Depression and Bipolar disorder. There are some other things I'd like to check out, even if only to confirm I don't have them, but money's been pretty tight for a long time. I think the only way any of it ties in with my RP at all, though, is that the sense of validation makes it a little easier for me to become socially addicted. ^^;
I have a mild form of Asperger's but I am high functioning. I also suffer from a form of depression that saps my passion and drive making me seem aloof and defeated. I also don't typically share this but I was also diagnosed to have sociopathic tendencies due to my Asperger's. The reason I don't often share this is due to the instant distrust I receive from it. As if I am always trying to hurt others when in fact I just don't fully understand or appreciate the relations I have. It has ruined friendships in the past. But I work my hardest every day not to allow this to control me or the people around me.

Sharing this makes me feel vulnerable but I also feel it makes me stronger in other more important ways. Because when I share this with others I expose myself to the bad and the good that others see in me. But I do remind them that I am still the same person I was when we first met.

RPs help me recover some of my drive, focus and practice for my social needs and learn that I am not in control of everything. RPs teach me about passion, the need to learn new and uncomfortable things, and to respect others.
PIASC

Lifetime member of the Anxiety Club. They just keep sending me stuff, even when I try to cancel!

It'd be interesting to look at some sample populations of roleplayers, to see if there's a correlation between our hobby and mental illness. Instinctively (AKA: I have no data, so I'm just guessing), I feel like there's a much higher percentage of atypical minds in roleplaying circles compared to the broader population.

Maybe it's because the act of roleplay itself is seen as a bit unusual. It is both introspective and speculative, which are things that probably come easier to people who have had to analyse their emotional and mental states in depth. Ironically, despite the fact that society adores actors and authors for appealing to our most human instincts, players who pretend to be characters are usually regarded as a fringe interest.

In my experience, yes, many of us are atypical. But in being so, we have learned to appreciate a very productive side of human nature that is all-to-often forgotten after childhood.
Sanne Moderator

PIASC wrote:
It'd be interesting to look at some sample populations of roleplayers, to see if there's a correlation between our hobby and mental illness. Instinctively (AKA: I have no data, so I'm just guessing), I feel like there's a much higher percentage of atypical minds in roleplaying circles compared to the broader population.

I think personally, the only reason there is a correlation is because roleplaying can be a coping mechanism. It will draw people who struggle in day to day life more often than people who are mentally healthy, because creative pursuits are rewarding and help build self esteem. My therapy group focuses primarily on crafting (you can do whatever you want, ranging from seasonal crafts like making wreaths for the winter holidays, to painting a self portrait, pottery, whatever you can think of really) because it's soothing and keeps you busy. Crafts have meditative qualities, and roleplaying is no different. You can explore topics that you struggle with and get a better understanding of yourself and others through it.

I don't think mental health problems create more creative people, I just think creative subjects draw people with mental health problems for their benefits. I see this a lot in knitting as well, a majority of knitters I know suffer from depression and anxiety, and they turned to (and stick with) it because it actually lowers your blood pressure and gives you the benefits of meditation, as well as feelings of accomplishments. It's a sort of therapy of its own. I think any craft can be that. :)
From what I understand I was diagnosed with very mild autism, mild aspergers, a good chunk of ADHD, bi-polar, social anxiety, fairly generic rage control issues due to an 'interesting' childhood, and the inability to process certain emotions correctly until I was around 18-20, among other less fun stuff. I

Suprisingly, I'm able to do well enough. My ability to function is mostly normal. I completed high school, went to college (although being young and dumb, I dropped out), and got a CNA license a little over a year ago. It was a mighty blow to my self image when I was young to learn not only did I have adhd, but a total of three things in the autism spectrum, mild but stacked. Even today I hate thinking about it - growing up it was made extremely clear by my parents what was wrong with me. These days, I know that it's "okay" and I have it more or less corralled into my control but... Some days are better than others. I hate sharing this - it makes me feel weak again, like everything that I heard growing up with my family is true. I mean, I know that isn't true in the least, but still, ya know? In the end, I am who I am, and I'm a good guy, even if my thick skull won't let me think it all the time ;3.

Ironically I ended up becoming a CNA who assists the developmentally disabled, which is just dripping in irony.

Sanne heads a good group called 'Here for You' that allows you to get some stuff off your chest. As mentioned earlier, there's no substitute for professional help, but it's nice to vent on the anonymity of the Internet for a bit.

@PIASC:
Regarding RPers as a population having more mental disabilities or what have you as compared to a control group, I'd believe it. To echo some of what Sanne said, it is probably because role playing allows you to break the bonds of every day life - in a story, you can be WHOEVER you want, as opposed to what you deal with every day.

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