Skip to main content

Forums » Smalltalk » My issue with family movies

Okay, so I just watched The Emoji Movie with my eight year old niece, and it was outrageous. Not because of how terrible it was, but because it followed the clichés of other family movies.
Here are a few that just tick me off.

1. Main character almost fails but succeeds anyway

I get it, you need to teach kids that they should always try for success, but why make it so the main character almost fails but doesn’t anyway? It’s unrealistic, let’s say a character is dying and their friend cries. It’s literally impossible to force yourself to live because your friend is sad. I’ve seen movies where a character survives something that they shouldn’t, and I get mad at that every time.

2. If there is a boy-girl duo, Hollywood thinks that romance is a must

I

Hate

This!!!

It makes me so mad when a boy and a girl become friends and make out at the end. Don’t get me wrong, I looooove romance, but only when it helps the story! Unnecessary kissing and romance is just weird. Maybe if Hollywood made a movie of a boy-girl duo that doesn’t have any unnecessary romance, i’ll be gucci. Or maybe even a gay couple, and no, being gay isn’t inappropriate for kids. So don’t bash me.

3. Toilet jokes

Seriously, not even kids find them funny anymore. So just.......stop.


That’s just a few of mine, if you have anything to add go ahead. I just wanted to get this off of my chest.
The first two don't bother me very much, although they are very true!

But #3 I'm completely with you on!

I'm trying to think of something else that bothers me about family movies...

I'm drawing a blank. But what annoys me is when movies go out of their way to have an unhappy ending, because it will get them more "critical acclaim," or whatever. And also racial tokenism in movies annoys me too. If I feel like a movie studio is throwing certain things into the movie just to be able to check off certain boxes instead of because it makes sense with the story, I don't like that.
It's not just "family" movies. It's media in general.

1 is just kinda how plots have come to work. It's not "exciting" enough if it doesn't look like total and more terrible failure might happen. Some definitely take it too far and make it ridiculous, but I don't think it's necessarily bad to do that in general.

3, meh. There are those who love them, and sometimes they're actually played pretty well. Most of the time... yeah, it's just a cheap joke.

But for 2, so much groan. Groan of agreement with you, mind you. I have no issue with a well-played romance, but I don't think romance is necessary for every story, especially since a lot of the time it's only being used A. to illustrate the hero's victory because he got the girl (yes, please notice that female leads tend to have less romance forced on them), or B. cheap drama shots. Ten times worse when there's pointless sex involved. A couple examples:
Stranger Things Season 1 spoilers
I was so looking forward to the amazing friendship that seemed to be forming between Eleven and Mike. They were so close, they were so intent on taking care of each other, and they were kids being kids. And when his buddies started teasing him about having a crush, I chose to believe Mike when he denied it. They were dear friends in a dire situation, not romantic. And then they made it romantic, even going as far as having the kids kiss. Why? At least the (mean) comment a friend of his makes about it just being because she was a girl who was being decent to him helps make it more palatable, because feelings really are fickle things and I fully acknowledge that kids get crushes too.

Spoilers for that Shannara thing on Netflix
Aside from that just generally not being great... I think it would have at least been better without the weird love triangle and especially without the sex. The first time sex happens... sure, it had a specific purpose, even though I still don't think it was needed. The last time though (at least in the first season? I heard they did another...) I was just like... really? With everything you just went through and everything that's about to happen, you're even able to think like that right now? Shouldn't you still be more upset about that friend you just lost, and hurrying to save your people, and getting dirt and bugs in unpleasant places? And I know it's not just because I'm ace, because my allo friends generally feel the same way about there being just so much pointless sex in things...

Ace = asexual
Allo = Allosexual, an umbrella for heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, and pansexual

More platonic adventures, please. And yes, more same-sex relationships in stories, and more triangles being resolved with polyamory, but I'm personally more interested in more friendships of any gender. Also couples who focus on doing the job rather than on kissy-times and sexy-times. And the occasional relationship that just doesn't work out and it's not the end of the world or the main plot.
The new Wreck-it-Ralph subverts some of these and was actually really enjoyable!

I don't recall toilet humor. And the main characters--Ralph and Vanellope--are best friends rather than romantic interests.

As for 1, I mean, that's not really a problem in just family movies. I'm watching the third season of Daredevil, and it's hard to suspend my disbelief for some of the BS.
I'm always DELIGHTED when a male/female pairing is depicted as JUST friends and will remain just friends and never were ever interested in one another.
Usually you only get this if they're somehow related (siblings, cousins or one is a kid etc) but maaan, I loooove seeing just friends. Growing up with most of my friends the opposite sex it always annoyed me that media kinda acted like male and female friendship wasn't a real thing and was just a leadup to dating.
I feel it reinforces this idea that boys and girls are "different" and that they can only see eye to eye when they're making out.

I also HAAAATE the narrative that a woman NEEDS a male love interest to be complete (really common trope)

and the one that really irrationally peeves me off? the makeover of the "nerdy girl"
ooooo it makes me mad.
they take a perfectly naturally beautiful girl, straighten her "icky curly hair" (wth? RUDE), remove her glasses (what? Glasses are hot, what you on about Hollywood?) and then force her into a dress she'd never wear and isn't at all her style and that she's not comfortable in, all to fulfil this classic stereotype of beauty and make the guy fall for her when he realises "oh she's hot under her nerdiness" not "she's hot because of her nerdiness" or better yet "she's just hot"
nope, instead we get "hey girls, to bag a man, which you need to do, don't be yourself! wear a mask! change yourself to conform! always conform! People will only like you if you fit this narrowly defined definition of beauty!"
and sorry, that's a really terrible message.

It also tells curly haired girls with glasses they'll never be pretty unless they change everything about their natural appearance and that's just rude and damaging.

family movies and romance movies in general also often seem to glamourise unhealthy relationships. You ever notice that? like, creepy stalker guy isn't creepy he's "omg romantic" if he sneaks into your house at 3am to profess his love. Following you home isn't cause to call cops, he's just "sooo sweet" and no, sorry, this behaviour is creepy and wrong and gross stop it.

I was watching Casper the other night, classic family movie that and oh god... Casper is SO CREEPY. Like, she's clearly not interested but he won't accept that and keeps pushing and being a creep and i'm sorry "can I keep you" is the CREEPIEST thing a guy could say to a girl. Just.. puke.. can you keep me? I'm not a pet, get the hell outta here you gross creep!
*shudder*
who thought that was cute? *gag*

Guys getting super possessive is apparently also desirable when it real life it's a massive red flag.

I dunno, I just.. i'm not sure hollywood really portrays relationships as at all healthy like.. ever.
Ben Moderator

1) Hard agree. Characters should succeed or fail, live or die, on the merits of their decisions. If they fail, then let them fail, let them learn from it and grow next time. Much better lesson to teach - AND much more compelling storytelling.

2) You know, I've always wanted to see a situation that has happened to me and several people I know, where an opposite sex duo decide that maybe they must have feelings for one another because that's the way it works, they try and make out or something, and are immediately like "wow that was awkward. nope. nevermind. I guess we're just friends."

3) Yeah, there's so much more to humour. You can totally start kids on better humour early.

@monkfish I also hate the nerd makeover. Especially because it's ALWAYS a super beautiful actress, and they are like, ok muss up her hair and put big glasses on her BAM ugly haha what a nerd.
Ben wrote:
2) You know, I've always wanted to see a situation that has happened to me and several people I know, where an opposite sex duo decide that maybe they must have feelings for one another because that's the way it works, they try and make out or something, and are immediately like "wow that was awkward. nope. nevermind. I guess we're just friends.".
It's a tough movie to get through for a variety of reasons, but P.S. I Love You does this, hahaha
Ben Moderator

Hah, maybe I'll have to give it a watch.
I hate all of these tropes with a passion. #1 is just poor writing, it infuriates me both as a writer and as a consumer of media. It has no message, it kills tension and suspense, and it makes for a boring story because you already know the outcome. #3 is often done by people who seem to have no accurate recollection of what it was like to be a child, or else they’re old enough that the experiences of their childhood were completely different than those of children today.

Now to #2. It’s already been covered that it’s a product of toxic masculinity and heteronormativity, so I won’t go into too much detail there. I wanted to mention though that sometimes it’s obvious that it only happened because of executive meddling—as if the suits think that a movie won’t get good ratings unless they shoehorn a first base scene into the end or climax of the film. That’s absurd and horrendous on its own. But even worse is when the writers or characters themselves seem to change their minds about whether or not they want a romance after adamantly refusing to engage in one. I have an example from a book series that I love to death, rather than from a film: Young Wizards, by Diane Duane. (Do note that I still haven’t gotten my hands on any book beyond Wizards of Mars, much to my frustration, so I’m a bit behind.)
Mild spoilers for YW to follow.
Throughout the series, Nita makes it clear that she has no interest in Kit, and he makes it clear that he has no interest in her. Until halfway through the series, when Kit makes one offhand mental comment about a girl he doesn’t recognize as Nita, wishing her miniskirt were shorter, that attitude is consistent. The offhand comment is all we get until Wizards of Mars, when all that rejection of romance between the lead characters is thrown out the window and half the plot is just Nita and Kit pining for and being jealous of each other, until they finally get together at the end of the book. All that stubborn insistence that girls and boys can be friends without romance is thrown out the window. I loved Wizards of Mars, I really did, but that aspect of it really frustrated me.

I can understand why Duane made that decision, but I still don’t like it. Growing up, fictional friendships between people who had no feelings for each other, like Kit and Nita at first, felt like validations of my lack of desire for a relationship, a lack of desire that made me feel broken somehow. (This was before I knew asexuality existed.) To have those fictional friendships, which are few and far between as it is, tossed out like yesterday’s garbage is not only frustrating but sends a harmful message to young people, especially kids on the asexual and aromantic spectrums like I am but also to every kid who doesn’t want to rush into that part of life. With the growing specialization of young people in media, it’s of utmost importance to depict platonic friendships that never become romantic or sexual, both between mixed gender groups and same gender groups.
/end rant

Also, the nerdy girl plot Purple_monkfish describes? Literally the plot of the Grease movie. So bad.

As far as Ralph Wrecks the Internet goes, I saw it the other day with a couple friends. It was really fun! The plot was all over the place, but it had a good message. Good concept, poor execution. Also, intentionally or not, Ralph is a good depiction of an autistic character, which made me and my fiancée very happy.
LaughingLLama Topic Starter

Purple_monkfish wrote:
I was watching Casper the other night, classic family movie that and oh god... Casper is SO CREEPY. Like, she's clearly not interested but he won't accept that and keeps pushing and being a creep and i'm sorry "can I keep you" is the CREEPIEST thing a guy could say to a girl. Just.. puke.. can you keep me? I'm not a pet, get the hell outta here you gross creep!
*shudder*
who thought that was cute? *gag*

Guys getting super possessive is apparently also desirable when it real life it's a massive red flag.

I dunno, I just.. i'm not sure hollywood really portrays relationships as at all healthy like.. ever.

I totally agree. I mean, some parts of the movie is cute, but other parts of it are just disgusting.
First of all, they're twelve yet hey still kiss at the end. Not only that, BUT HE LITERALLY GETS HAPPY WHEN THE GIRL GETS IN HIS BED!!!
That's a sneaky dirty joke, and it was kinda funny, but it's just messed up to make a kid make that little joke.
Novalyyn wrote:
More platonic adventures, please. And yes, more same-sex relationships in stories, and more triangles being resolved with polyamory, but I'm personally more interested in more friendships of any gender. Also couples who focus on doing the job rather than on kissy-times and sexy-times. And the occasional relationship that just doesn't work out and it's not the end of the world or the main plot.

All of this, but this line in particular. This. Did I mention this?

I am so sick of the whole "choose one or the other" scenario in love triangles and all its related tropes. For example, when the main character starts having regrets, dates the other person for a bit, then realizes that they loved the first person all along. ...Really? Or they and one love interest were always destined to lock eyes on each other... Even though the main (and sometimes even the love interest) has locked eyes with the second interest on many, many, many an occasion. Can't they be "destined" while having another person along for the ride that loves them too? Or override/rewrite the "romantic prophecy" to three or more people because screw destiny, all of them deserve the other no matter what fate has to say about it?

Of course there's the good/evil, light/dark, wholesome/sensual dynamic between the two love interests to help the main choose. C-can't both be similar in a way? Or like each other for that matter? Why does there always have to be a rivalry or war between them?! Even best friends for years start low-key turning their backs on each other when a romantic interest/main character shows up.

Then there's the scenario when both love interests are very good for the main character, but something changes in one of them to break the triangle that's completely unrealistic to that particular character or dynamic. I understand certain issues arising like feelings changing, unshared secrets established in a prior episode, etc. But breaking a triangle because of something contrived (ex. A minor event happens. One character is okay with this event and still loves the main. The other shows this "uber secret horrible/otherwise OOC side" that was never mentioned or hinted at before, goes off on the main, and ditches the triangle only to get their "just desserts" later on) irks me so bad. Bonus points if they tease the characters starting to make up before the point of no return.

It's like the producers realized that polyamory might be an option: the chemistry works so well between them all, the fans love it and have started their speculations, and there's nothing in the story that can cause any major changes to break said dynamic... and went, "Nope, can't have that. Couples only." Then they tossed darts at a board to see which love interest they should jack up with something random and nonsensical.

Just one. Good. Ending. Where polyamory. Is. The answer. I beg you. It's not that hard! ;A;
I would just like to point out, another good example of a male/female pair being friends, rather than becoming an instant couple, is seen in Frozen. Like or hate the movie for other reasons, it subverts a lot of the romance tropes people had come to expect of Disney movies, and really, movies in general.

You are on: Forums » Smalltalk » My issue with family movies

Moderators: Mina, Keke, Cass, Auberon, Claine, Ilmarinen, Ben, Darth_Angelus