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- - - (played anonymously)

Hi!
Whenever I find a character I’m fascinated by and think I would like to roleplay with, I message them and say so. Recently, 9 out of 10 times (I don’t do it that extreme, it’s just an example to give you an idea of how often it happens) whenever I’ve messaged somebody, I haven’t received anything back from them. It’s very discouraging because I understand if somebody isn’t up for it, but I would honestly rather get a message back that says something like “Hey, thanks for your interest but I’m not really up for it” than getting nothing back.

So, I was wondering if anybody has any tips on how to get rid of this feeling and getting the courage to message others, without fearing I won’t get a reply back?
Rogue-Scribe

It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.
I'm somewhat agreeing with Dunedain-Ranger, but I would at least send a reply back with my refusal. You were willing to take a bit of time to approach and be brave enough to do so in the first place, so the least I think you can do is politely decline.

That being said, coming up with a name and some profile content should help you get some replies back. Being a complete blank slate would definitely dissuade people from wanting to rp with you.
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.

Please correct me if I misunderstand what you mean, but I never message people anonymously!
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Katia wrote:
I'm somewhat agreeing with Dunedain-Ranger, but I would at least send a reply back with my refusal. You were willing to take a bit of time to approach and be brave enough to do so in the first place, so the least I think you can do is politely decline.

That being said, coming up with a name and some profile content should help you get some replies back. Being a complete blank slate would definitely dissuade people from wanting to rp with you.

I agree, if I was the one receiving said message, I would polite decline and then move on.

But thank you for your advice, I will surely use it the next time I approach somebody!
Rogue-Scribe

- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.

Please correct me if I misunderstand what you mean, but I never message people anonymously!

Ok. How am I to know that though? You started this thread with your anonomous triple dash name. Maybe if you started this thread with your writer's account name, I would have understood that. ;)
I have a similar fear! Often I find I can get one or two replies before they lose interest and stop interacting with me entirely. Sadly, beyond being 'nicer', I can't think of any viable solution to this problem right now.

(´・w・`)
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.

Please correct me if I misunderstand what you mean, but I never message people anonymously!

Ok. How am I to know that though? You started this thread with your anonomous triple dash name. Maybe if you started this thread with your writer's account name, I would have understood that. ;)

I figured it was pretty logical that I don’t send out messages anonymously, which is why I didn’t mention it at first. :)
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

kayzorch wrote:
I have a similar fear! Often I find I can get one or two replies before they lose interest and stop interacting with me entirely. Sadly, beyond being 'nicer', I can't think of any viable solution to this problem right now.

(´・w・`)

Aww, I’m sorry. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who experiences this, but I’m still sorry it has happened to you
- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.

Please correct me if I misunderstand what you mean, but I never message people anonymously!

Ok. How am I to know that though? You started this thread with your anonomous triple dash name. Maybe if you started this thread with your writer's account name, I would have understood that. ;)

I figured it was pretty logical that I don’t send out messages anonymously, which is why I didn’t mention it at first. :)
It's only logical if you know the person. How they approached it was one direction it could logically go your thought was the other direction. In answer to your original post the only thing you can do is assume that it isn't you but that they either didn't have the time at that point in time to reply and then forgot(as unless they go to their inbox frequently they'd not have the bolded inbox notice.) or that they figure it best not to respond the former is more likely.
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Lorvilran wrote:
- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
- - - wrote:
Dunedain-Ranger wrote:
It would probably help if you actually had a name. If I got three dashes in a PM, I wouldn’t bother replying either. I’d think, ‘this guy can’t even come up with a name. Their RP posts would probably be the same’. You need to put an effort into trying to sell yourself. Just sayin’.

Please correct me if I misunderstand what you mean, but I never message people anonymously!

Ok. How am I to know that though? You started this thread with your anonomous triple dash name. Maybe if you started this thread with your writer's account name, I would have understood that. ;)

I figured it was pretty logical that I don’t send out messages anonymously, which is why I didn’t mention it at first. :)
It's only logical if you know the person. How they approached it was one direction it could logically go your thought was the other direction. In answer to your original post the only thing you can do is assume that it isn't you but that they either didn't have the time at that point in time to reply and then forgot(as unless they go to their inbox frequently they'd not have the bolded inbox notice.) or that they figure it best not to respond the former is more likely.

I think you misunderstood me a bit; I thought it was logical, from what I wrote in the first post, that whenever I message somebody to ask if they're interested in a roleplay, I never message them anonymously. I try to think that it's either of the cases, but it has turned out to be a bit difficult.
I understood. But yeah the end was my attempt to point to what I used to do in hopes that it might help.
If you haven't been already, it may help to invite a negative response. Something like:

"If you don't feel up to it for any reason, just let me know! :) "

This is an unusual case where I'll suggest putting in a smile even if you don't feel like it, simply because it helps the friendly, non-threatening vibe. If it feels wrong, though, no worries, you certainly don't have to and depending on circumstances it may really be best not to.

Beyond that, it's also possible that the person just hasn't seen it yet, or that they lack the time to respond in a way that they find acceptable.
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Lorvilran wrote:
I understood. But yeah the end was my attempt to point to what I used to do in hopes that it might help.

It does, thank you!
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Novalyyn wrote:
If you haven't been already, it may help to invite a negative response. Something like:

"If you don't feel up to it for any reason, just let me know! :) "

This is an unusual case where I'll suggest putting in a smile even if you don't feel like it, simply because it helps the friendly, non-threatening vibe. If it feels wrong, though, no worries, you certainly don't have to and depending on circumstances it may really be best not to.

Beyond that, it's also possible that the person just hasn't seen it yet, or that they lack the time to respond in a way that they find acceptable.

Ohh, this is a great idea, thank you!! I usually just assume that they're busy or that they're not interested, but I'll definitinely add your suggestion. I think the smiley is a good thing, so I don't risk coming off too harsh or anything and more friendly!
It's pretty obvious that you started this with your anon slot because you don't want people to know who you are - not that you message people for RP with this same one. Tons of people have a blank anon slot for forum stuff they don't want their profile or characters attatched to. 🙄 So I'm sorry people kind of ganged up on you about it and assumed you don't know how to make characters well and that's your problem.

As for what's happening to you... It happens to everyone, unfortunately but I understand how much it sucks. My advice would be to flesh out your variety of characters a little more, and only message people who you also have ideas to offer them as well about their own idea.

I'm one of those people who is far more likely to be interested in a message that says 'Hi I'm interested, I'd like to use this character, and I was thinking perhaps this and this could happen. What do you think?'

If you find people still aren't really responding, then I'd stick to making your own posts in the LFRP.

I pretty much exclusively only post but don't reply to other posts. Because I rarely get replies from other people that have posted, but I when I post in the LFRP I get flooded with messages.
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

damnationfromafar wrote:
It's pretty obvious that you started this with your anon slot because you don't want people to know who you are - not that you message people for RP with this same one. Tons of people have a blank anon slot for forum stuff they don't want their profile or characters attatched to. 🙄 So I'm sorry people kind of ganged up on you about it and assumed you don't know how to make characters well and that's your problem.

As for what's happening to you... It happens to everyone, unfortunately but I understand how much it sucks. My advice would be to flesh out your variety of characters a little more, and only message people who you also have ideas to offer them as well about their own idea.

I'm one of those people who is far more likely to be interested in a message that says 'Hi I'm interested, I'd like to use this character, and I was thinking perhaps this and this could happen. What do you think?'

If you find people still aren't really responding, then I'd stick to making your own posts in the LFRP.

I pretty much exclusively only post but don't reply to other posts. Because I rarely get replies from other people that have posted, but I when I post in the LFRP I get flooded with messages.

I can't possibly thank you enough, just for understanding what I meant but also for acknowledging it and expressing it. It means a lot to me, though I maybe just should have been clearer in the start post.

That's also a very good idea, thank you so much! I just tend to browse through characters and sometimes I get the courage to message them and ask if they're up for anything, so I should probably be less spontaneous, hahah.

I've experienced much the same, if I make a post in the LFRP forums, I'll get a lot of replies but only a few people will actually reply to me - if I see somebody who's made a forum and I want to interact with them, I usually privately message them because it's easy to get lost throughout a lot of responses
Cass Moderator

Hi friends,

This is a friendly reminder to be kind to other site members. I am sure it was unintended - but please remember our 'be nice' rule. :)
- - - (played anonymously) Topic Starter

Cass wrote:
Hi friends,

This is a friendly reminder to be kind to other site members. I am sure it was unintended - but please remember our 'be nice' rule. :)

Thanks for this, I think it was needed :)
Balin (played anonymously)

Heya! We all go through this, but attacking the fundamentals is crucial. Consider the following:

1. What fascinates you about the characters? It's probably something different for all of them. Take note of it and try to emulate the literary techniques (or if it fits, the traits) when you draft up characters.

2. Take stock of the potential limiting/alienating factors of your own characters. Figure out which are core, and which could be flexible based on RP. I have to live with the fact that not everyone's going to want to write with a character of Balin's size, but his morals and exact capabilities are negotiable.

3. Find out what information you like to see in a character bio and make sure it's there. A lot of people want an informative, readable take on appearance and personality.

Wishing you luck!

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