THE LOVE WE
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Most people would know the name Hamilton; a wealthy and powerful family. On the cover of magazines, an active part of documentaries and articles. An interesting life. A life most people would die for. In this family it’s not just money that matters - it’s image. Everything that comes close to mistakes, weakness or a scandal will instantly get removed.
Being the youngest of two daughters. While her sister was groomed to take over the responsibility of the family, she herself was left to a life in the shadows - spoiled, but overlooked. Controlled, but without power. Her existence always being a scenery: had to look like the perfect daughter, but was never taken seriously.
Though, she wasn’t unhappy. She was smart - and she knew there were way more worse lives to live.
Getting pregnant at 16, outside of marriage. Coming home crying in her mothers arms, needing a hug, needing validation. Instead, she was rushed to a monastery abroad, where she gave birth in secret. No one ever came to visit her, not even her own mother. Trapped and isolated, no contact with the outside world. Giving birth with strangers around her. Only getting one glance at her baby before it was taken from her. Denied to keep the baby, it was adopted away. As she returned home, the whole situation was erased like it never had happened. But she never forgot.
Never allowed to grieve the loss of her child, it was never talked about again. No one ever asked her if she was okay, and that began to haunt her. Alone. She was all alone surrounded by people who didn’t care about her well-being. A ghost in her own home.
Controlled and elegant, knowing exactly how to fit it and how to behave. Charming like that, likable and welcoming. Always being a warmer person than her sister, even though people often feel like they don’t really know her. One glance at her and you will think ‘’what problems could this woman possibly have?’’. The reality is far more cruel. A grief that was never allowed to come forward; turned into a deep loneliness. Sitting in a room filled with people, she will feel like she is all alone. Anger, towards her parents. Towards the society. Never letting her anger out - she was taught that it is ugly. Instead she will shrug her shoulders and learn how to deal with things she gets mad at.
She is beautiful, perfect and empty. All at once. 24 years old. A part of the family imperium, but only as a cover up for her real role as the family's "princess," who must be kept alive as a symbol of success.
Participating in events and galas, but rarely feeling like a part of it. Standing in the corner, watching everybody else. Wanting what they have. Real love. A marriage. A child. A lover that will never let her down, never make her feel lonely again. But always falling for the wrong men. Unconsciously seeking confirmation in men that reminds her of her father, where demands and expectations were placed on her. Never had a healthy relationship.
A perfectionist. The perfect daughter, the princess of the family. The perfect woman. But all that glitters is not gold.
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