Posted by Kim on October 22, 2016, 2:05pm
What do you attribute to the site's usual good-natured tone and how do you keep it from turning toxic like many other places people come from?I think there are a lot of pieces to that recipe, but I can say for sure, it is not an accident, and it is a lot of dedicated work every day.
Here are a few (thought not all) of what I see as the key components:
Active and involved moderators
It's really, really easy for things to get out of hand very quickly on the 'net, and half the time those situations that spin out no one was originally trying to be malicious, there was just a misunderstanding. Therefore, it is crucial that there be Adults In Charge who can, if nothing else, halt a situation by locking a thread if they detect the people in it are having trouble controlling themselves.
Zero tolerance for toxic behaviors, harassment, etc
Sometimes it's hard to know the intent behind something, but we try to catch issues early, and discuss things with members before they become serious problems. Most people want to be good community members and maybe don't know they are being rude, and will attempt to correct their issues if they are brought to their attention in a kind and private way. It's easy to be shy about this and go, oh, well, they didn't mean it or it wasn't so bad, do we really have to make an issue out of it? But if you wait until someone does something SUPER BAD to have your first conversation with them, it's too late, they may have earned a long ban when they could have avoided any ban if we'd had the courage for a gentler conversation much earlier on. So we try to keep that in mind.
But when someone starts with true name calling or other harassment, that's it, bans are going to be handed out. It's important that this is true even if the mod on duty happens to also dislike the person being harassed; there's no excuse for it, ever. People who can't control themselves in this way don't often spend long on the RPR.
New members have the tone of the site demonstrated for them immediately, and by lots of people
This is why the introductions board is such an integral part of the RPR and why I am so keen on seeing people jump in to welcome new members. When new members arrive, they learn through the example of others what the community norm is here. People generally want to fit in, and when going to a new place, often try to emulate what they see others doing there whether they know it or not. Having a dozen people greet them with metaphorical open arms and internet smiles, offer to help them and reassure them that the community is friendly and non-judgemental and happy to see them sets an immediate tone.
The community works to keep itself positive
At this point in the site's life cycle, the community at large is getting pretty good about reminding one another about the site's rules and core values, and also at using the report buttons to flag "questionable" behavior and ask that a moderator investigate further to make sure everyone involved is okay.
We also hold periodic events aimed at training people to cope better in tense situations; sometimes this takes the form of community discussions, where we field a question about how to handle a social problem (the "god modding" discussion was a great example of this) and let the community talk it out. The Festival Of Being Excellent To Each Other is another example. In that one, I typically spend a week writing articles about how to take good care of the OOC bonds that make fun IC interactions possible.
There's tons more, but I'm actually curious, what do you attribute it to?
Gamers wrote:
We do have a very good-hearted community. I've seen people come out of the wood work to help their fellow RPRian, and it is awesome. Good people attract good people, that is one part. The other part is that the community itself doesn't tolerate toxic people, which helps to keep them at bay. Combine The good natured people and non tolerance of the community toward negative people with active and fair moderating, and you have a community that refuses to sour. Mods here are approachable, friendly, and really just seem to be one of us with some added responsibilities. So many other sites and servers have mods that believe themselves superior, and so drama erupts.
Churchtuary wrote:
Maybe it's how friendly the welcoming messages are? I remember having that feeling of "Wow, this place's different." when I first stumbled into the Knight's Oath page before finally being able to post. Alternatively, I find that your constant watch over the community as a second factor.
Sanne wrote:
I've always considered the way the RPR moderates its members the primary reason for it. The mods don't get hung up on technicalities and look at the human side of people. People are judged by their efforts to be the best they can be instead of a cold hard "Three strikes and you're out" system like I see on a ton of other sites (excluding some of the really, really bad illegal things people do). Friends don't get special treatment and get a message and face consequences like anyone else would. And people who are genuinely just here to cause grief and upset people get the boot when it's evident they're not interested in being a better member and just keep causing trouble.
Second to that comes the community - I think the mods and you lead by example, and people pick up on it quickly. That makes the members lead by example too. We've created a culture of being open and welcoming, but firm about being nice and tolerant as well. People who don't fit in are generally the troublemakers that make it toxic in other places, and they either get booted for breaking the rules persistently or they leave of their own accord.
Then there's the accumulation of little things, like the reward system for welcoming members (which is also a good 'lead by example' example for new members), the contests that are team focused, the tools that are designed with connecting to others in mind etc.
Second to that comes the community - I think the mods and you lead by example, and people pick up on it quickly. That makes the members lead by example too. We've created a culture of being open and welcoming, but firm about being nice and tolerant as well. People who don't fit in are generally the troublemakers that make it toxic in other places, and they either get booted for breaking the rules persistently or they leave of their own accord.
Then there's the accumulation of little things, like the reward system for welcoming members (which is also a good 'lead by example' example for new members), the contests that are team focused, the tools that are designed with connecting to others in mind etc.
lasagnalover9 wrote:
I actually think "Friendliest place on the web." isn't at all an exaggeration, this very well could be one if the friendliest places on the web. And I think part of that is because, like you said, RPing is a team sport. The community has to work together to help this place improve. And not just by Rping with each other, but by designing themes for everyone, welcoming people who want to get into RPing and answering their questions, creating community-ran magazines, newsletters, etc. and overall so mang people have contributed ti the site, even if they just made their ideas heard during office hour.
FreeJayFly wrote:
Yeah, good moderation and moderators are pretty key in a healthy community. That's actually why I love it here so much and talk to my friends about joining and being active on here. I've met a lot of great people and have really liked being able to talk with a number of the members here just because it's so laid back and welcoming.
How can individual RPers contribute to the community to keep it the wonderful place it already is?
Love this question! There are so many ways:
- Use the report button on forum posts, character profiles, user profiles and private messages if you see anything that worries you. They are there for everyone's safety and comfort. Just reporting something doesn't mean the person will automatically get in trouble; the mods will review to determine if there's been any actual rule breakage before anything happens, and most minor offenses just involve a friendly note to educate the person about the rules. And you might not even be reporting an outward problem. Sometimes people just report a post that made them worry for a member's well being, and want a mod to check in on them. Maybe you are reporting a behavior that is not rule breaking on its own but is happening so many times so close together it's making it hard for other members to get anything done, and having a mod talk to that person kindly about how to consider others would be good. In short, the mods aren't just here to "get people in trouble," we're here to help smooth over social friction between members and keep things running smoothly BEFORE problems hit, too.
- Give thoughtful, timely welcomes to new members on the introduction boards! Make sure all their questions are answered ASAP. Offer to RP with newbies!
- Occasionally write thoughtful kudos
- Take leaps of faith and try RPing or chatting with someone new every once in awhile
- Practice self awareness. Log off if you realize you are extremely cranky and losing your temper with people. Take a walk, listen to some music, take a shower, have a sandwich, and then come back when you're feeling calmer.
Do you have any hints you can give for the next Epic Week? Will Doubutt be making a reappearance?
I can say that next Epic Week will have more of a sci-fi flavor than the previous ones have had! Doubutt will undoubtedly join us in celebrating again, he is deeply connected to the land of the RPR.
I've seen people question when to call a mod into a situation. Can you touch on when it would be a good idea to call in some help from higher up?
I think I've touched on this some in my previous answers, but really, call them in any time you are unsure. They can evaluate the situation and let you know if they can't/shouldn't take any action (yet), and then you don't have to wonder about whether you should or shouldn't!
It's also okay to report your OWN posts, if you need help getting a topic moved to another board, for example.
Ditto with bug reports, by the way; only about 1 in 5 bug reports that are submitted turn out to be something actually broken that I need to fix. And that is fine. The other four people were not wasting my time. It is ALWAYS better to be safe than sorry, so please don't be shy! I want to have the opportunity to double check things and make sure everyone is having the best RPR experience they can be.
Having been a mod on a popular MC server, I can tell it is a very demanding job. Mods here deal with multiple times more people than I ever did. What is the best way for RPers to make a Mod's job easier, and what is the best way to show them our appreciation for their work?
That practice self awareness thing I said above is a good one. Also, try to keep in mind that most of what mods send out every day is not personal at all; if they had to mark a picture of yours as mature, that might feel bad to you for a moment like you screwed up, but there was almost certainly not even a twinge of negativity felt by that mod toward you. They probably pressed that same button and sent that same letter to 12 other people before you and it was NBD. Take a breath before responding with a freak out if it turns out you missed something or needed a quick reminder.
When uploading images, remember to check that "mature" box if it contains nudity, swearing or extreme gore. The mods have to review everything that is uploaded and flag it for you if you forget to, and it makes our days much smoother if we can just glide through clicking "Approve, approve, approve," instead of stopping to mark things and write letters about why.
As the site expands, it becomes impossible for us to read everything that goes on. Plus, some things happen totally invisibly to us, like with PMs! Which is why I keep harping on the report button. It lets us seem to be everywhere at once, without us having to attempt to read every word typed on the site. We don't want to do that, and I don't think anyone else would want it, either!
The best way to show appreciation is to say thank you. If you see a mod do something helpful or put their own psyche in the way of someone who is flipping out in order to shield others, let them know that you saw what they did and that it does not go unnoticed. Tell them that you appreciate what they do for the community. Private messages or kudos are great ways!
Some RPers are unsure of themselves and their RPing abilities, and so they largely refrain from the joys of RPing. Do you have any advice for them to get into RPing with this community in particular?
We all start somewhere, and almost every excellent RPer you meet will shuffle their feet and mutter a story about all the mistakes they made when they were just getting started. But almost all of them will also tell you they are willing to play with complete "newbs" so long as that person shows a willingness to learn and be vulnerable. If you are trying to cover for your fears by talking a lot about how great you are or nervously chattering about why your character is a certain way and why that's okay becaaaaaaaause... it can be a turn off. But simply saying, I am working on improving, I really appreciate your patience! will smooth over a ton of bumpy posts.
I'm also gonna leave this here for the question about RPers who are uncertain of their abilities:
http://www.rprepository.com/help/responsibility-of-rpers
http://www.rprepository.com/help/writing-for-rp#153
I know you're probably all really tired of me posting those links, but the community made fabulous points in both, and they are just filled with awesome advice for improving at RP really quickly.
Does your server have a name ?
His name is Server, of course!
While many sites have age restrictions, what happens to those that joined before they were of age, but have since turned old enough to join?
This is really hard, because if a person joins before they are 13 years old, they are causing me to break the law. In the US, it is illegal for anyone to store information about someone under 13 years of age without a bunch of signed forms from their parents. This includes their email address. So I cannot emphasize this enough: If you lied about your age to get in, you are making me an unwilling criminal. I really do not appreciate this. It is very hurtful for me to be put into this position. It's not that I dislike you or want you to not have any fun, it's that I don't want to be accidentally breaking federal law.
I know that it's not done maliciously, but because it involves criminality, we typically ask that people who come forward having lied about their age before they turned 13, but are now 13 and want their account birthdate adjusted, to serve a temporary ban as penance for doing this.
If you are currently younger than 13 and didn't realize the consequences for lying about your age to get in, please, back up your character profiles and close your account. You can come back on your 13th birthday!
I was wondering if there was an easier way planned in the future to control what displays on your profile. I''m kind of a shy person with RP for various reasons.. and things like name changes showed up on my activity feed
No, I have no plans to do this. Online, you don't have a face for people to recognize, you just have a name. It can be very confusing and disruptive for digital social circles to have people changing their names, and some malicious behaviors can even be carried out by people name swapping to suddenly seem like new people. Sending out the alert is meant to guard against those confusions and problems. In extremely rare cases where serious abuse and stalking is involved, I will sometimes waive the name change alert by hand.
Suggestions for groups:
1) Some type of table widget so I can neatly sort group information
2) Some kind of poll so I can do things like this without having to head to a third party
I'm not sure if we'll be introducing a table *widget*, but I do have plans to upgrade the columns BBCode to make it easier to control how big each column is. That might get you what you're wanting if used in a text widget?
Polls would be SUPER USEFUL. They can also be really complex to set up and display. I would love to do it. I am trying not to say I don't have plans, because I really want to add them and think they could be a great asset, I think what I really mean is I don't have a blueprint yet. There's a lot of pondering that needs to happen before I could execute a polls feature.
One of the fun problems that constantly comes into play with new features is how to handle multiple identities and that some of those identities are anonymous. We'd have to take care that people couldn't swing polls if they had tons of characters, or a lot of anonymous characters.
So do you ever have to ban someone for something that wasn't technically in the rules?
Not really. Since rule #1 is Be Nice, that covers a whole huge swatch of nastiness without us having to write a 72,000 page tome on all the ways in which it is possible for someone to be unpleasant toward others.
What are your and the site's thoughts on community made and run activities and entertainment? Ex- Contests, Newsletters and magazines, and even RP events?
Oh man, I love those things. Love them. It's always wonderful when the community creates its own ways for people to get more involved. I am happy to support and tweet out links to those sorts of things most of the time.
Every once in awhile we might contact someone with suggestions for how to make their rules for homebrew contests/events more robust, but that's just because we have six years of experience running official events and have seen a lot of ways in which things can get weird.
What's the most difficult project you've had to work on for RPR?
That is a tough one. There's been lots of them.
Notifications and all the rules governing how they can be combined, the constant struggle to optimize them so they run at acceptable speeds, etc. etc. has been a constantly evolving battleground for me. That might be the hardest.
But the most intense pressure projects have all been Epic Week events. Those take HUGE amounts of code, art, plot, unholy buckets of moderator attention, constant monitoring and difficulty tweaking on games, and it all HAS to be done and work in the same week; there's no going back to fix things later, once the week is done, it's done.
Say two characters are texting, and it would be in their character to use text speech. Would that be allowed, or is it still against the rules?
I don't think we'd have any problem with that.
Kim, what's your favorite part about RPR?
Without a doubt, the community. The people. RP is not a solo sport, and no matter how good a writer a person is, it only works when the people they are playing with are willing to be engaged and creative and to take risks and let their own creations be vulnerable. And we have tons of great people like that here, who are mindful of the people around them and trying to keep the atmosphere of the entire site friendly and fun.
How is Mr Truffle doing?
Mr. Truffle is relieved to be allowed to go back outside now that the "storm of the century" is over in these parts (he spent several days in the basement to avoid the extremely high winds and ridiculous buckets of rain), but I think he's a bit bored since I am currently sick and not spending as much time outside with him as I normally would. I just haven't felt like hanging out in wet grass would be a good way to recover
If someone were to want to run a community-made project (such as a webazine, newsletter, etc.) where should they start?
I think that would depend a great deal on what the project was, exactly! But if I were going to start a community 'zine, I'd probably start by picking a topic and then going out and interviewing other community members on those topics, or inviting people I'd seen posting opinions about the topic on the forums before to submit an op ed piece.
Getting collaborators involved can also help boost the chances of success/longevity of those types of projects, so they don't fall apart if the founder gets a cold
Is anything exciting planned for FOBETEO this year?
There maaaaaay be a big update for the kudos system coming out right around FOBETEO (that's the Festival Of Being Excellent To Each Other for those who don't know yet, an annual winter celebration where we take time to appreciate and strengthen the OOC bonds that makes good IC interactions possible!), and we maaaay be hosting another kudos drive in correlation with that update.
I'm still deciding what topics to write about for FOBETEO this year. Do you have any suggestions for life skills you'd like to learn to be better at, when it comes to nurturing and caring for friendships?
Other than Epic Week, Trick-or-Treat the forums, and FOBETEO, are there anybother RPR events?
Oh for sure, we're starting to have a pretty packed calendar of annual events. The February Meet Cute event is always popular. That's where people introduce one of their characters to someone else's character that they've never RPed with before, and try for the cutest, funniest, most dramatic or otherwise memorable Two Characters Meet Each Other type scene they can possibly come up with.
We also host Moderator Appreciation Day in the summer, which isn't just for our site moderators -- moderating any size of community, whether it's an RPR group with 6 members, a minecraft server, or an in-person LARP game can be an exhausting and sometimes thankless job, so we take the day to recognize the efforts of moderators anywhere they are toiling.
Plus, we also host two art trades every year, one in the summer and one in the winter. The winter art trade signups should be going up pretty soon here, actually!
...Oh, you know what, over the last couple of months we've also started doing "RP Prompt Friday," which I hope will become a tradition that goes on for years, and we end up with a colossal library of prompts huge enough to pep up any RP and smash any writer's block.
I'm open to suggestions for other events and contests you'd like to see!
Comments
GASP you left out the most important tidbit!!
Kim wrote:
Walruses already have a role in the upcoming Epic Week!
Dragonfire
October 22, 2016
9:35pm
I appreciate all the comments regarding moderation above! It can sometimes be intimidating to go to a mod, in any kind of setting, but the vast majority of them have nothing but your (and their community's) best interests at heart. A big part of doing moderation usually also includes (often more than) a bit of mediation, as well, and that requires bunches of understanding and patience to do effectively - so please don't be afraid to speak to one if you think you need to!