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Sanne Moderator

Novalyyn wrote:
I can't quite tell if folks are saying "be sure to ask" or specifically "be sure to ask before you start a game."

Asking a general "is there anything you'd like to avoid or have extra check-ins for" makes sense (and I need to get better about remembering that), but if you're the type who doesn't set out with any specific plan, it seems like there are too many possibilities to ask about all of them until it looks like there's a chance that it might come up at all. Possibilities do get narrowed down with planning, of course, but bringing back my example of my teen character who had a crush on my friend's character, the possibility of that happening never occurred to me until we were well into the game. Had anyone mentioned it, I'd have probably been like "what, haha his character is a jerk and too much older and I don't even know if she can think that way yet."

But I figure asking at the first sign that it could be a thing would still leave room to try maneuvering things away from that before it becomes an issue. If the first sign is before the game starts... awesome.

I usually just tackle those things as they come after the initial check-in. I don't always remember everything I don't want to do up front, and I don't expect others to either. But if I'm introducing something significant enough that it influences one or more characters emotionally or physically, I touch base with the person briefly and then take it from there.

"Hey, I'll be introducing <thing> in my next post, is that okay with you?" and whether it's a yes or a no, I can take it two ways without any real interruption. It costs next to nothing to check before writing your post and gives the person the chance to give input.

I do feel like some people think this means they can't post anything in an RP without approval. That's not how it should be, I think if you reach a point where you're checking in for every little thing you're doing it wrong. For the most part, it's about themes and topics which cover a broader spectrum of actions in RP. AKA "I want to introduce romance" usually means there will be dates and kissing involved. You wouldn't need to check in with dates and kisses if you addressed romance already, that's part of romance. A crush would fall under romance too, obviously!

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