I'm just tired of trying.
Yes, thats happened to me before. I've had several people directly tell me that they felt too intimidated by my posts to rp after I gave a starter (none here though, yet).
Spiritualeclipse wrote:
Yes, thats happened to me before. I've had several people directly tell me that they felt too intimidated by my posts to rp after I gave a starter (none here though, yet).
blarg
It does seem intimidating when one seems so good at their craft, but that's often a natural reaction especially for some who are insecure or conscious with their skill to roleplay. That's how I felt when I first came here. Everyone knew how to write so well that I wasn't even sure if I was good enough to be anyone's RP partner. However, as time passed by and the more I roleplayed, I started getting to a level which fit majority of my previous partners.
It's not wrong to be very good, but from what I learned, when things seem off and your partner seems uninterested all of a sudden, it's always nice to remind them to loosen up and to not depend their answers on impressing their partner. It's nice to see your partner put a lot of effort to their writing, but roleplay is not a competition on who can reply something lengthy or with so much detail. It's all about having fun. ^^
It's not wrong to be very good, but from what I learned, when things seem off and your partner seems uninterested all of a sudden, it's always nice to remind them to loosen up and to not depend their answers on impressing their partner. It's nice to see your partner put a lot of effort to their writing, but roleplay is not a competition on who can reply something lengthy or with so much detail. It's all about having fun. ^^
muhr
Antlered_Wolf wrote:
That is exactly why I have practically no expectations for other people anymore. All I really want is at least four-five sentences and something I can reply to. I'm trapped in a body that I hate. I stutter, I have a lisp, I have disorganized thoughts, and I can't say the right words when I need to. Even my writing isn't one-hundred percent. I'm tired of people assuming I'm normal. I have dyslexia and struggle so much sometimes that I don't speak much if at all some days. Writing is a soundless manifestation of trailing thought for me.
Bandaid's don't even begin to cover some of the crap I have to deal with outside this website. I'm tired of trying to use writing as a medium to work through my problems when all it does is create more problems. Just because my writing is good doesn't mean that I can measure up every where else in my life. I'm just screwed up and miserable like the majority of the population.
Bandaid's don't even begin to cover some of the crap I have to deal with outside this website. I'm tired of trying to use writing as a medium to work through my problems when all it does is create more problems. Just because my writing is good doesn't mean that I can measure up every where else in my life. I'm just screwed up and miserable like the majority of the population.
This sounds like a problem far surpassing the frustrations that come with role play. If you need help to cope with things, you should reach out to someone. If support systems in your family or friends aren't enough, then professional help could be necessary to get things sorted out.
These are the words of a stranger, yes, but honestly I want to help you in any way I can.
argle-bargle
blahm
I've been on the receiving end of this. I've had people RP with me and just been "THEY ARE SO GOOD AAAAAAAAAA????" and gotten so nervous that I had to quit. I haven't had this happen in a few years, but it's definitely happened.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
DarkCrow wrote:
I've been on the receiving end of this. I've had people RP with me and just been "THEY ARE SO GOOD AAAAAAAAAA????" and gotten so nervous that I had to quit. I haven't had this happen in a few years, but it's definitely happened.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I usually tell people I'm an actual writer. I'm at a collegiate level, etc. My starters and even my posts can be long, but they aren't boring. The develop plot and give my partners insight. I get frustrated when I put time and thought into something and it ends up falling apart. It's becoming more often than not. I used to have a lot of this in my about me, but I felt like it was scaring people away as well.
Antlered_Wolf wrote:
DarkCrow wrote:
I've been on the receiving end of this. I've had people RP with me and just been "THEY ARE SO GOOD AAAAAAAAAA????" and gotten so nervous that I had to quit. I haven't had this happen in a few years, but it's definitely happened.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I usually tell people I'm an actual writer. I'm at a collegiate level, etc. My starters and even my posts can be long, but they aren't boring. The develop plot and give my partners insight. I get frustrated when I put time and thought into something and it ends up falling apart. It's becoming more often than not. I used to have a lot of this in my about me, but I felt like it was scaring people away as well.
What I will say in response to this is:
"Actual writer" varies wildly.
"Actual writer" can be a 1000 page novel or a 100 page mini-novella type thing. Still "Actually writing", but vastly different.
Personally I think RP still counts as "Actually writing" since people are actually writing, but y'know ;P
The suggestion of specific numbers still stands though. It gives less wiggle room for misunderstandings. Worst case scenario, if you keep getting worried, have an average post held to the side so you can ask, "Hey, do you need example of my usual posts?" and then have it ready in case your partner wants to see what you get out more often than not.
Everyone finds a partner / partners that work for them though, sometimes it just takes time. Hang in there, it'll work out in the end!
Having read all your posts before they were 'deleted': I will simply say that while it is frustrating no doubt, no one is obligated to continue RPing with you because they aren't a fan of your post length or detail intensity. I write quite a lot myself and give plenty detail most of the time but even I've dropped RPs because how much detail someone tended to write was simply too much for me and was difficult to respond too and I'd rather not force myself to continue with that. I've done the same thing with people who write less than me or have a very low detail intensity.
Sometimes it's not because it's boring, and it's in fact interesting on a story level but I am simply not into it and can feel that our writing styles don't mesh well. Other times, despite what the writer thinks and feels, I personally find it boring/uninteresting and simply don't want to continue on which is my and everyone elses prerogative. It has nothing to do with the person not working hard enough or too hard, and simply is based on personal preference, thoughts, and feelings. It's going to happen no matter what.
Using terms like 'intimated' and 'actual writer' honestly rub me the wrong way, especially as someone who is an author but would never tell someone 'oh by the way I'm an author so I'm an actual writer'. Books and rp aren't the same thing in a technical sense, but they are both actual writing. Someone who writes 3 sentences and prefers someone who writes 3 isn't less of a writer.
I hope you have an easier time in the future but you should be aware that speaking about people and yourself in terms of 'intimidated' and 'actual writer' can really rub potential partners the wrong way.
Regardless I hope you find someone to write with.
Sometimes it's not because it's boring, and it's in fact interesting on a story level but I am simply not into it and can feel that our writing styles don't mesh well. Other times, despite what the writer thinks and feels, I personally find it boring/uninteresting and simply don't want to continue on which is my and everyone elses prerogative. It has nothing to do with the person not working hard enough or too hard, and simply is based on personal preference, thoughts, and feelings. It's going to happen no matter what.
Using terms like 'intimated' and 'actual writer' honestly rub me the wrong way, especially as someone who is an author but would never tell someone 'oh by the way I'm an author so I'm an actual writer'. Books and rp aren't the same thing in a technical sense, but they are both actual writing. Someone who writes 3 sentences and prefers someone who writes 3 isn't less of a writer.
I hope you have an easier time in the future but you should be aware that speaking about people and yourself in terms of 'intimidated' and 'actual writer' can really rub potential partners the wrong way.
Regardless I hope you find someone to write with.
DarkCrow wrote:
Antlered_Wolf wrote:
DarkCrow wrote:
I've been on the receiving end of this. I've had people RP with me and just been "THEY ARE SO GOOD AAAAAAAAAA????" and gotten so nervous that I had to quit. I haven't had this happen in a few years, but it's definitely happened.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I'd say the best thing to do in order to avoid this is to be really honest with your partners about how much you write. Personally my starters can get into mini-novella territory, whereas my usual replies, once the RP gets going, are only a few small paragraphs. I make a point to let my partners know this beforehand. I make it a point to say, in my LF RP posts, how much I write, IE "I get out # - # amount of paragraphs per post on average", and if my first post is way longer than that, I'll often message that partner OOCly and say "Lol, sorry, my starters are usually way longer than my actual posts" so that it doesn't absolutely come out of nowhere for them.
I've found that when people are open with me / I'm open with them about my writing lengths, it makes this issue ... pretty much nonexistent.
I usually tell people I'm an actual writer. I'm at a collegiate level, etc. My starters and even my posts can be long, but they aren't boring. The develop plot and give my partners insight. I get frustrated when I put time and thought into something and it ends up falling apart. It's becoming more often than not. I used to have a lot of this in my about me, but I felt like it was scaring people away as well.
What I will say in response to this is:
"Actual writer" varies wildly.
"Actual writer" can be a 1000 page novel or a 100 page mini-novella type thing. Still "Actually writing", but vastly different.
Personally I think RP still counts as "Actually writing" since people are actually writing, but y'know ;P
The suggestion of specific numbers still stands though. It gives less wiggle room for misunderstandings. Worst case scenario, if you keep getting worried, have an average post held to the side so you can ask, "Hey, do you need example of my usual posts?" and then have it ready in case your partner wants to see what you get out more often than not.
Everyone finds a partner / partners that work for them though, sometimes it just takes time. Hang in there, it'll work out in the end!
I didn't word that well. I write novels in my spare time and am attending a university. I write a lot. I should probably start using samples. It just sucks that I have to do so. Most posts are only ever short if my partners posts aren't super lengthy. I can't write a paragraph or more off of a one word conversation.
Mercyinreach wrote:
I will simply say that while it is frustrating no doubt, no one is obligated to continue RPing with you because they aren't a fan of your post length or detail intensity. I write quite a lot myself and give plenty detail most of the time but even I've dropped RPs because how much detail someone tended to write was simply too much for me and was difficult to respond too and I'd rather not force myself to continue with that. I've done the same thing with people who write less than me or have a very low detail intensity.
Sometimes it's not because it's boring, and it's in fact interesting on a story level but I am simply not into it and can feel that our writing styles don't mesh well. Other times, despite what the writer thinks and feels, I personally find it boring/uninteresting and simply don't want to continue on which is my and everyone elses prerogative. It has nothing to do with the person not working hard enough or too hard, and simply is based on personal preference, thoughts, and feelings. It's going to happen no matter what.
Using terms like 'intimated' and 'actual writer' honestly rub me the wrong way, especially as someone who is an author but would never tell someone 'oh by the way I'm an author so I'm an actual writer'. Books and rp aren't the same thing in a technical sense, but they are both actual writing. Someone who writes 3 sentences and prefers someone who writes 3 isn't less of a writer.
I hope you have an easier time in the future but you should be aware that speaking about people and yourself in terms of 'intimidated' and 'actual writer' can really rub potential partners the wrong way.
Regardless I hope you find someone to write with.
Sometimes it's not because it's boring, and it's in fact interesting on a story level but I am simply not into it and can feel that our writing styles don't mesh well. Other times, despite what the writer thinks and feels, I personally find it boring/uninteresting and simply don't want to continue on which is my and everyone elses prerogative. It has nothing to do with the person not working hard enough or too hard, and simply is based on personal preference, thoughts, and feelings. It's going to happen no matter what.
Using terms like 'intimated' and 'actual writer' honestly rub me the wrong way, especially as someone who is an author but would never tell someone 'oh by the way I'm an author so I'm an actual writer'. Books and rp aren't the same thing in a technical sense, but they are both actual writing. Someone who writes 3 sentences and prefers someone who writes 3 isn't less of a writer.
I hope you have an easier time in the future but you should be aware that speaking about people and yourself in terms of 'intimidated' and 'actual writer' can really rub potential partners the wrong way.
Regardless I hope you find someone to write with.
Well, as I just stated below. I word things wrong sometimes. I've been writing since I was really little. I have strong attention to detail, thought, and conversation. I get irritated when people ignore me with no explanation. I am by no means perfect, but writing is the one thing I enjoy above all else. When people rp with me, I can't carry them and it is seriously irritating when they decide to ghost me. I am flexible, but the extent of my flexibility is about 3-4 sentences. 1-2 liners disinterest me very quickly. I typically start most of my rp's just to try help the story. I usually warn people that my posts are long and very detailed.
You are on: Forums » Smalltalk » Ignore/Delete this
Moderators: Mina, Keke, Cass, Auberon, Claine, Ilmarinen, Ben, Darth_Angelus