Skip to main content

Forums » Art & Creativity » Anyone care to critique a story

Hey guys, so I decided to try to get back into writing my story, based in the world of Tokyo Ghoul. I'll leave a description of the show and world below for people unfamiliar with it. But what I would ask of the beautiful people of RPR is to just see what they think of what I have so far. The story is far from over, but I'd like to see what people thing, even if you aren't familiar with Tokyo Ghoul, outside critique would be appreciated. Also, let me know what some of your favorite parts were, and which you didnt like or thought could be adjusted. The story is called A Monster of Two Worlds and it's published on Wattpad.
(Fans, forgive me if my description is a bit off or weird sounding)
But essentially there are creatures called Ghouls, who look and act exactly like humans, but they possess a few interesting quirks. One, They can turn a special cell in their body called RC cell (RC is short for Red Childern, given as how the cell look like curled up fetuses) and they can use this to make an extra appendage called a Kagune, which take the form of a Tail (Bikaku), Wings (Ukaku), an Arm Covering (Koukaku), and Tentacles (Rinkaku). Ghouls also have enhanced strength, speed, durability, and the ability to change their eyes from normal to the whites of their eyes turning black with their iris and pupil turning crimson red. Downside to all this power is Ghouls can only consume human flesh, as their body rejects other food, meats tasting rancid and fruits and veggies tasting overly sour and putrid, Although coffee is a good way to supress their hungry for a while. It's because of this they're hunted by specially trained detectives nicknamed Doves. Ghouls also wear masks, so their identities can remain a secret while out looking for food or fighting Doves.

You are on: Forums » Art & Creativity » Anyone care to critique a story

Moderators: Mina, Keke, Cass, Auberon, Claine, Ilmarinen, Ben, Darth_Angelus