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Forums » Suggestions & Development Discussion » Disallow minors to PM you

Sanne wrote:
Arkavious wrote:
My question is at that point, what about people like me that have a net so bad that getting onto most websites is almost impossible? it takes me an hour to load some websites, and sites like facebook that have a ton of flash content will not load for even longer. I tried to start loading facebook on my stuff last night and I am still waiting for it to load.

What exactly are you asking? I'm not sure what slow internet has to do with age verification/adults/minors?

How would you verify your age with out loading some website that has personal information on it? Or that you have to sign up? I am asking how in the world people are going to Verify one's age with out having to go onto 10 different websites first.
Sanne Moderator

Arkavious wrote:
How would you verify your age with out loading some website that has personal information on it? Or that you have to sign up? I am asking how in the world people are going to Verify one's age with out having to go onto 10 different websites first.

That's impossible to answer right now because we have no idea what age verification would even look like at this point if it was implemented at all. The only thing I can repeat is that this feature would be optional and just add some peace of mind to people who want to protect themselves from accidentally RPing with minors and getting prosecuted as a child sex offender.
Well Idk about the whole "just talking to a minor will get you in trouble" thing. I think that's a little far fetched, maybe no for a teacher. But if this is gonna happen, then those who are worried about their jobs and such can definitely have the option.

Just don't go overboard on the facts, cause I'm sure there would be more rules on role-playing with minors on this site if that were true, not to mention the fact that we could prove ourselves clean of sexual interactions with minors since we have the pm messages.

But yeah, I see the reason people might feel more comfortable with this.

Also the age verification thing might work, but I fear that won't be very soon. We are possibly looking at a few years until that's worked out. Until then, I suggest people,being careful. I mean, usually in able to tell a minor from an adult based on the way they speak. Yeah, sometimes that doesn't work, but I'm also not into as much fire or sexual stuff as other people might be.
LawOfJohnson wrote:
Well Idk about the whole "just talking to a minor will get you in trouble" thing. I think that's a little far fetched, maybe no for a teacher. But if this is gonna happen, then those who are worried about their jobs and such can definitely have the option.

Just don't go overboard on the facts, cause I'm sure there would be more rules on role-playing with minors on this site if that were true, not to mention the fact that we could prove ourselves clean of sexual interactions with minors since we have the pm messages.

But yeah, I see the reason people might feel more comfortable with this.

Also the age verification thing might work, but I fear that won't be very soon. We are possibly looking at a few years until that's worked out. Until then, I suggest people,being careful. I mean, usually in able to tell a minor from an adult based on the way they speak. Yeah, sometimes that doesn't work, but I'm also not into as much fire or sexual stuff as other people might be.

On mobile, please excuse spelling errors.

A lot of places have laws that could hurt adults speaking with minors if the parents decide it is not okay. Even with proof of pms, they can be deleted.

For professions that work with the public can be let go for public perception. Where I am this can include teachers, doctors and nurses among others. If someone hears i am roleplayig with a kid, they might presume any number of things and try to put my head on a pike. It's not likely, but I am not going to take that risk and I keep my interactions with minors to a minimum for that reason.

This can also go the other way, however. As a minor I did some stupid stuff and was afraid of adult interaction online for a long time. I would have refused to talk to anyone older than 20 when I was 16/17.

No one should be shamed for not wanting to interact with anyone older or younger than them.

Edit to add: I would appreciate if people are quoting me or mentioning my post, they either quote directly or mention my name. I'm starting to feel like I am not a part of the discussion because I have been repeatedly referred to as "the teacher" and I really want to keep contributing while we are talking!
Sanne Moderator

LawOfJohnson wrote:
Well Idk about the whole "just talking to a minor will get you in trouble" thing. I think that's a little far fetched, maybe no for a teacher. But if this is gonna happen, then those who are worried about their jobs and such can definitely have the option.

Just don't go overboard on the facts, cause I'm sure there would be more rules on role-playing with minors on this site if that were true, not to mention the fact that we could prove ourselves clean of sexual interactions with minors since we have the pm messages.

But yeah, I see the reason people might feel more comfortable with this.

Also the age verification thing might work, but I fear that won't be very soon. We are possibly looking at a few years until that's worked out. Until then, I suggest people,being careful. I mean, usually in able to tell a minor from an adult based on the way they speak. Yeah, sometimes that doesn't work, but I'm also not into as much fire or sexual stuff as other people might be.

Thing is that every country has its own laws on this, so a site-wide rule set to cover all potential scenarios wouldn't work. That's why currently, it's limited to what it is - trusting users when they sign up, and restricting accounts that belong to minors from specific areas of the site. We've got a global userbase, what goes in my country wouldn't go in yours for example, whether or not the server is US based is irrelevant to the laws in my country. I'm not going overboard on the facts, what I stated was 100% true for Cacophony. He currently is a teacher, he's passionate about his career, and I trust he knows what he's talking about when he says even non-sexual contact with a minor can make him lose his teacher's license and lose his career forever. Let's not second guess people when they make statements that apply to their specific situation and take their word for it, especially on a subject as sensitive like this.
Then I remove myself from this discussion since it appears that I have offended people.

I hope everything gets worked out for everyone.
Sanne wrote:
CelestinaGrey wrote:
I understand that it makes you uncomfortable, but I just don't see the strict need for the option. A one-message response does not take that much time or effort, and can continue to encourage the 'friendliest place on the net' vibe.
If I was a minor reading all of this, I would certainly feel attacked and upset. It's not my fault I was born when I was? What's wrong with me that I make people uncomfortable? Do I not write well enough?
Those kinds of thoughts would be definitely running through my mind if this were an implemented option.

I was a minor reading this thread, I would realize that people can get in serious trouble for talking to me because of their country's laws, and I should always be honest about my age and respect their decision of not wanting to talk to me so that won't happen to them. I think what people are more upset about is the misinterpretation of being barred from talking to any adult ever on the site, which is not really what is being said here.

Adults can get into legal trouble for talking to minors even in non-sexual situations. Cacophony for example can lose his job and never work as a teacher again if he talks to a minor on the internet, regardless of whether there is smut involved or not. That's why this issue is important. Even less serious concerns and feelings are totally valid here.

I'm a bit confused on this... how can someone get in trouble just for talking to a minor? Wouldn't they be unable to use the entire site in general? Perhaps I'm misunderstanding.

EDIT: Jumped the gun a little, I did see some of the other posts explaining a little bit. I'm still confused as to how they can use this site at all though, since they might interact on a forum topic with a minor?
Sanne Moderator

CelestinaGrey wrote:
I'm a bit confused on this... how can someone get in trouble just for talking to a minor? Wouldn't they be unable to use the entire site in general? Perhaps I'm misunderstanding.

I'm not Cacophony so I can't really answer for him, as he's Canadian and I'm not. I think he explained in his previous post why he can't interact with minors. When we're talking interaction, we're talking one-on-one or direct contact discussions. Putting in his opinion on a topic that is shared by minors is obviously something else entirely than having actual discussions in private between a minor and an adult teacher like Cacophony. As far as I'm aware, he's not advocating against any contact with minors ever in public settings because that is just physically not possible in the real world and online, but minimizing it and refusing any contact in private is his primary goal.


Edit:
LawOfJohnson wrote:
Then I remove myself from this discussion since it appears that I have offended people.

I hope everything gets worked out for everyone.

I'm sorry if I gave the impression I was offended, I'm not. I just want to make sure people don't dismiss legitimate potential situations because it's not something that applies to them in their location. It not applying to certain people or them being unaware is no basis to dismiss the experiences of others or question the validity of their concerns. I understand some of the laws/consequences we deal with are outlandish and strange and make no sense, but they affect people in real life dramatically and it should not be taken lightly, unfortunately!
CelestinaGrey wrote:
Sanne wrote:
CelestinaGrey wrote:
I understand that it makes you uncomfortable, but I just don't see the strict need for the option. A one-message response does not take that much time or effort, and can continue to encourage the 'friendliest place on the net' vibe.
If I was a minor reading all of this, I would certainly feel attacked and upset. It's not my fault I was born when I was? What's wrong with me that I make people uncomfortable? Do I not write well enough?
Those kinds of thoughts would be definitely running through my mind if this were an implemented option.

I was a minor reading this thread, I would realize that people can get in serious trouble for talking to me because of their country's laws, and I should always be honest about my age and respect their decision of not wanting to talk to me so that won't happen to them. I think what people are more upset about is the misinterpretation of being barred from talking to any adult ever on the site, which is not really what is being said here.

Adults can get into legal trouble for talking to minors even in non-sexual situations. Cacophony for example can lose his job and never work as a teacher again if he talks to a minor on the internet, regardless of whether there is smut involved or not. That's why this issue is important. Even less serious concerns and feelings are totally valid here.

I'm a bit confused on this... how can someone get in trouble just for talking to a minor? Wouldn't they be unable to use the entire site in general? Perhaps I'm misunderstanding.

EDIT: Jumped the gun a little, I did see some of the other posts explaining a little bit. I'm still confused as to how they can use this site at all though, since they might interact on a forum topic with a minor?

Public interaction is different than private interaction. It's just like if I were to go into a coffeeshop and talk to a barista who is 16. A public forum that multiple people can see and interact with is different than going into the backroom with the same barista - we aren't doing anything, but how many parents would be interested in knowing that I was alone with their kid, out of view of everyone else.

There are certain protections here, because Kim keeps things catalogued for a certain amount of time, but private versus public are two different beasts.
Kim Site Admin

Hello all! Given the amount of interest in the age verification idea, I've started a new topic specifically for that discussion: https://www.rprepository.com/community/forumthread.php?t=50353

It contains some clarifications about what that idea had looked like on my end.
I personally understand completely this whole want for an age verification. It would as people are saying be optional and not everyone had to do it. Yes as someone said you could get minors who just want to message you and ask you questions about your character and not role play and blocking all minors would stop that. This is true but then again, they will have others to ask and not being able to ask me if i blocked them would not really destroy their lives. I am in my late 20s I do not want children to talk to me on here either as I too have seen some of the trouble people can get in to and iv personally had people during my 10 years roleplaying as young as 13 trying to ask me for smut and its just horrible. I would be up for age verification.

Someone has mentioned verification apps for ids and such. I have also been part of the site where age verification is an optional thing and to do it. You just send them a picture of anything from a birth certificate to your student id or drivers licence and they will verify your account as being aged verified. The picture, your real name etc are not shown to anyone else other than those who run the site and have the ability to age verify. That way you can only make yourself visible to those also verified as adults.

Yes in turn i see that this move can also make adults who have not being verified wont be able to see your profile or message but at the end of the day it is one of the ways that would put at ease all those who are older and dont wish for potential trouble. There is no 100% fix for it sadly.

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