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Forums » RP Discussion » LFRP Communication Etiquette

I’m putting this up for discussion...

Someone puts up an LFRP thread in the LFRP forum. They usually have some parameters on what they are looking for, possible plots, limits, etc. They end with “PM me if you’re interested.”

Someone then posts something like ‘I have several characters that would work Or I could make fit. Take a look at them and PM me if you’re interested.’

So is the onus on the person who put the LFRP thread up to pursue the responses put in the thread when they clearly say to ‘PM if interested’?

My personal opinion is if they can’t follow a simple instruction and bother to PM their interest to the thread creator but can post to the thread wanting the thread creator to PM them, it says to me they are somewhat lazy and won’t be a good RP partner.

I see this a lot in the LFRP Forum.

What are your opinions on the art of LFRP Communication Etiquette?
Am I being too harsh?
I personally find it quite annoying when I put up specific LFRP posts and get a response in the forum, after asking for PM, and ALSO being told to scour someone else's characters for them and pick one. It is absolutely aggravating and makes me feel like I am being forced to do all the work for the story.

This usually also leads me to putting together 90% of the story and then even having to guide the entire story. It's so draining.

If someone cannot bother to PM and also answers my very specific LFRP with "read all my characters and pick one" I am 99% going to ignore that person entirely.

There are times when people have posted generic LFRP about a character of their own, I will generally PM and offer a suggestion of 2 or 3 of my own if I cannot fully decide which would be best. However, I am not going to just point at my character's and tell the person to go read and choose. I'll explain in summary the characters, how I think they might work, and give a little bit of plot idea for each one and then ask if there is one that sounds more to the other writer's preference.

Successful rp stories are a 2 way street.

Generally, when I post ‘PM for interest’ It’s because I don’t intend to look to the forums; I have a harder time tracking it and I am not keen to public discussions for 1x1 stories.

There are two things I dislike in LFRP ads: when someone cannot follow basic instructions and posts to the forum, or when they DO PM me but its rather obvious, they didn’t read my LFRP ad nor my character profile.

I don’t think it necessarily leads to bad RP directly as I have had some that have turned out just fine. But its certainly a red flag for me. Like the effort to actually post to the forums is the same if they have actually opened up the character profile to read. It’s a single click.

So these days, as mean as it might sound - I just ignore anyone who posts to the forums instead of PM’ing me. I figure if they want it bad enough, they will figure it out.. but I don’t have time to chase people around the internet.. I got other RPs and people who PM me. If it means I miss out on a good RP.. I guess I will never know.
Not too harsh at all. I can understand why someone might not want to PM someone first, but I always put 'PM me if you are interested, not reply here' for a reason. The reason is irreverent, it's just my decision, no reason to defend it or explain it. It's just what I have decided is one of my preferences and boundaries. So if someone doesn't message me and instead replies to the forum post, if I even happen to see it, I don't reply and I don't message them except in very rare cases.

To me, not following the simple guidance of 'please message me if you're interested' is just as bad as expressing interest in an RP where the person says they want someone who writes concise but you only write para, or they want someone who writes para but you only write concise. It's not respecting the posters boundaries and wishes that have been put simply put into place for good reason.
I just like that you used the word "onus." #vocabulary
Sanne Moderator

I think the expectation that somebody reads your message and follows the instructions if they decide to play with you is an absolutely fair one.

I also think people sometimes get too excited about an idea and fire away a message cause they missed something in their excitement. I generally try not to assume ill intent or an inability to follow instructions, and remind myself that I've made that mistake too. If their idea seems interesting, I'd reply in the thread asking them to PM me their idea. Otherwise I might just let it be.
It could be something of a yellow or orange flag if it's stated clearly that you want PMs, but there's also everything Sanne said; sometimes people get excited and miss some information. It's a little annoying but I've done it before myself, so I can't fault anyone else for that behavior. Absolute worst case scenario is a frustrating RP experience, and I'd take the risk if the player commenting seems decent enough.
Oh I completely agree. This is one of my worst pet peeves!
I have never asked someone to look through all of my characters, but I will admit to asking them to maybe look at 2-3 so I can go with the one they like best if it isn't an obvious choice. I will also never suggest looking at any characters that I can't already see a story for and I wouldn't want to sort through all of someone's character unless they only have a couple of characters.

As for the other pet peeve, I generally just leave both options open at first, but then I'll take it to pms if one catches my interest.
I do agree I get aggravated on some of my threads I put up when LFRP since I clearly state pm me if interested. But I also know some players are new and don’t fully understand how RPR functions. I only get upset because they’ll reply to the thread and I won’t see it cause I rarely check back on my threads.

Never the less it’s hard to even get the simple things setup sometimes and he. Doing a LFRP as those that have played with me I’m super laid back and adjust to make things comfortable for them and myself so we can enjoy a good rp. But needless to say if I put it in Bold in my description it’s important and is warranted to be read as it maybe important.

Really it’s a mixed set of emotions on LFRP manners such as carefully reading what the person wants and not souring the mood.
Rogue-Scribe Topic Starter

Yeah, ok. I didn’t think I was the only one. I think I only made a couple LFRP threads since I’ve been here. I usually pm others who put the threads out, or get into RPs by other means.

I just find it odd that the tables get turned in these threads. Maybe some are excited but a lot of the times the posts reads like pure laziness or they want to turn the attention to their characters.

I suppose as long as a good rp is had from it, it doesn’t matter. :)

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