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Forums » Suggestions & Development Discussion » Minors hiding age (NOT PLANNED)

Can we make it so that minors are clearly labeled on their player profiles and can't hide their age? As an adult, I want to clearly be able to identify underage players. I think it's fine for those 18+ to be able to not list their age, but not kids. Also, this may be touchy, but I don't think underage users should be able to set character ownership to "anonymous".

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I understand this and have had similar worries - but I do not want a way for minors to be distinguished on site without their permission. I don't want a way for people to be able to find out whether or not someone is a minor because adult accounts are marked, either. Children shouldn't have to openly be children because I feel like that can get unsafe.

As long as a minor isn't on the adult forms, which lying about their age is very much so against the rules all together, I can't complain. I only use the adult forms or only roleplay with people who display their age to avoid writing with children.

Anon characters are a little difficult as well - which again is why I only use the adult forums.
We as the adults on this website could maybe be more proactive by marking our accounts as adult / with our ages, and defining in our rules that we do not want to write with writers under specific ages. It again lends it to personal choice, which keeps it optional for people who are at a more vulnerable age. As well as just utilizing the adult forums more and hopefully doing away with the idea that its only erotica on the adult forums that I've seen some people complaining about.
AgentMilkshake Topic Starter

I agree with what you said and try to practice all of these tips. On my profile and any rps I set up are marked Adult Only despite not having sexual themes or even anything inappropriate.

I strongly support adults labeling expectations on here and being proactive. However, I also feel that it should be mandatory that minor player profiles and characters be identifed clearly for their own safety if nothing else.
Yeah, I didn't like the sound of this either. Just ask your partners to list their age or don't write with them. Forcing kids to have their age listed online is a bad idea and I doubt their parents would like it. Sort of serves as a dinner bell for unsavory folks.

There's too many other ways to ensure that you're writing with an adult for this to be necessary.
Kim Site Admin

We cannot revoke the right to privacy from an entire class of people like this, even if we did think it would make them safer.

There are situations where it would make them less safe. Do you know it's common for parents to encourage their kids to lie about their age online, claiming to be an adult, on the belief that this will protect them from predators looking for children to groom. I personally think this exposes them to encountering way more of the kinds of content the parents are trying to avoid, but it's absolutely a thing that happens. I think this would just encourage this kind of ruse.

However, can I interest concerned parties in the comfort & privacy setting "Who can initiate private message conversations with you?" and the choice "My age group" ? This works both for minors and adults who want to be more silo'd. People you message can still respond, but only people in your age group will be able to START an inbox convo with you.

I do want to caution that if you're going to write some spice, you should STILL ask your writing partners to confirm their age for you. People are vastly more willing to lie to a faceless website they're registering for than they are a more real-feeling person they're talking to directly.
Yeah, the closest to something like this I'd ever want to see is adults having the option to display some sort of site-official "I'm 18+" marker. That way if they have concerns about privacy/identity theft keeping them from making their specific age public, they could flip that marker on instead of proving what parts of the site they can access and post in (and effectively just create spam posts for proof of age).

And still... asking really is important. And it can actually be surprising how unwilling someone can be to lie when directly asked by a person. Not too long ago, in a different place, I had someone kinda randomly trying to flirt at me, which alone was enough to shock me into "the heck do I do with this?" Tried just being friendly, but person was bent on flirting, and I felt sure that even just letting them do that one-sided would be bad if they were a minor. So I asked. The person did everything they could to avoid saying, "Yes, I am 18+." This included stating that they simply say they're over 18 because they aren't comfortable with sharing their specific age. I wasn't after a specific age. I was after a clear, undebatable statement that they either were or were not 18+. I ended up blocking the person just for my own legal safety.
“AgentMilkshake" wrote:
I think it's fine for those 18+ to be able to not list their age, but not kids.
Nah, if it became necessary for some people, it would only be fair to make it necessary for everyone. Though, I'm glad this isn't being implemented at all.
I can see where you're coming from for this idea, but in all honesty I think that would create more problems rather than fix them. Could easily result in some poor kid getting in contact with a child groomer. Trust me, we don't want that.
I agree that it shouldn't be forced for anyone. As someone who started role-playing at the age of nine with my older siblings and their friends through table top games I'm glad I wasn't band because I was a kid when they turned 18 years of age, but of course it was very family friendly and did not involve any sexual themes.

Online is much more difficult to verify. I think for those of us who are adults, I'm wondering if a third age group such as 21+ could be added. It will no solve all problems, but being 13 to 17 and saying you are 18+ is perhaps more common and easier to pass off than lying about being 21+ plus, having a steady job or being a university student. I quick casual OOC conversation could quickly make it easier to check if someone claims to be older than 21+.

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